The Italian solution

In a surprise move Italians have floated and, in some cases, decided to resolve their financial woes by getting others to do it.

It’d be too inconvenient to give up their second salary and pension from the job they don’t often attend or for them to pay even some property or income tax. And for the state to enforce tax laws? What a bother.

It’s far more sensible to require foreign visitors or foreign states to pay money to government - a brilliant and quintessential Italian solution.

Dear Mr Albanese

11 August 2011

The Hon Anthony Albanese
334A Marrickville Road
Marrickville
NSW 2204




Dear Mr Albanese,

Thank you for your letter.

I apologise for not recalling when we met. I assume we’ve met as you used my given name in your salutation. Mind you, if we’ve been introduced, it’s more likely you’d have employed the common abbreviation of my given name.

Anyway, thanks for the invitation to hear you and Mr Combet discuss the carbon tax. Regrettably, I was unable to attend, though I do have a few questions for you.

In your letter, you say the carbon tax won’t be a tax paid by “ordinary Australians”. I was wondering if you could tell me the criterion by which you determine which of us is ordinary and which of us is extraordinary?

If some of us are not considered ordinary, will we be paying the tax?

What do you say to the proposition that Australians, regardless of their ordinariness, are less concerned about who’ll be paying the tax directly to your government than with whether they’ll be paying for it indirectly?

Can you provide an assurance that even “ordinary Australians” won’t face increased costs and charges as a result of the tax? I’m happy to pay my share, but I’d just like you to be straight with me.

Finally, though I applaud you getting young people involved in the democratic process, it does seem a bit tough to have primary school children signing your letters for you.*

I look forward your reply.

Yours sincerely,



Merely Being


* Oh, sorry, it’s just been pointed out to me that’s what your signature looks like. Suddenly, things are becoming clearer.

Well that’s a relief, Commissioner

It’s not been a good few weeks for Police Commissioners.

Adrian Handstock, the Commissioner of the London Metropolitan Police, said, “We kept a dignified response to that to allow that protest to take place. However, once that extreme violence - and it was violence that could not be anticipated on that scale – occurred, we moved the appropriate level of resources in”.

Dignified? How heartening for those who were beaten, robbed or had their homes destroyed. Fuck dignity, where’re the water cannon? At least if they didn’t use them on the rioters they could have put out some fires.

But more ridiculous was his defence of the police response. Wouldn’t an appropriate level of resources have snuffed out the rioting?

What would Aussie cops do? Not much better - unless the rioting was confined to a single mentally ill person, preferably a teenager. Then we’ve no doubt they’d show great bravery in shooting the poor kid to death from a safe distance.